Taking Control

Earlier this week I flicked through my saved searches on Twitter and came across a brilliant piece on NPR, “For Hoarders, the Mess Begins in the Mind”. 

Courtesy of Grap/Wikimedia Commons

It’s a moving 4 minutes and 30 seconds.

The discussions between psychologist Catherine Ayers and one of her patients, Cheryl Sherrell, hit on something very important: control.

Having control over what you get rid of and what you keep is key whether you have a little or a lot of stuff in your way.

I have personally experienced this when working on A&E’s Hoarders. Nothing can be removed without permission and rightly so. This can be challenging for viewers who might be thinking, “Just get rid of it!”

But try turning that around. Every so often I will look around my apartment and ask, ”What do I have that needs to go but is still here?”

Without fail I will find something to donate or recycle. It really blows my mind since I live in a  uncluttered one-bedroom apartment. Then again that might be one of the reasons I work for 1-800-GOT-JUNK?.

A couple weeks ago I pulled my once-favorite vintage leather coat that hadn’t seen the light of day for more than a year.

I knew I had to let it go, but it was tough. We shared so many good times together. It was a part of my identity. 

Some months previous, my girlfriend tried to toss it for me. I didn’t respond very well because I wasn’t quite ready to part with it and no one could make me get rid of it.

Then on a sunny Saturday my coat and I took a walk to the donation bin. We remembered the good times, the bad times, the laughs, the tears.

As the coat slid into the bin I second-guessed my decision for half a second, but the other half brought a sense of relief.

The experience wouldn’t have been pleasant if I didn’t take control. I needed that sense of autonomy or I would have regretted getting rid of it. I know it.

Instead, I smiled as I walked away thinking about that lucky soul who will throw it on and love it as I always will.